Garden Pooper

Someone is pooping in my garden! I want to blame the dog down the street. I often see him walking around loose. We also have some outdoor cats in the neighborhood. I am no scatologist, so I have no idea how to determine what species the culprit is, but I'm pretty steamed about it! The problem is that with poop come flies! I took my morning garden walk and inspection and swear there were about 200 flies swarming around a nice pile of poop. I scooped it up and called for the flies to follow me to the trash, but they didn't. They instead resettled on the nearby fence rail like a flock of crows, just watching me and waiting for me to leave so that they could lure the pooper back to my yard for some more goodies! They are definitely in cahoots! I just know it! They will not get the best of me though! I am the master of my domain and I will deal block the problem pooper with a nice bit of chicken wire around the bed. Of course, a cat could climb or jump over the four foot high wire, but if she is willing to make that much of an effort, she really deserves the right to poop in my garden!

Please note my love for you, the reader, in that I resisted including any images of the offenses in this post. Who loves ya, baby?

Composting is not for the Faint of Heart -or- Was that a Mouse in My Compost Bin?

I was so enjoying working in my yard yesterday. The day was beautiful: sunny, warm enough for shorts and a t-shirt, but cool enough to still work outside. My compost bin did it's duty through the Rochester winter and was now ready to provide me with a good amount of rich wonderful compost. So, I was turning the pile in the bin to access the finished compost and I do believe I saw a mouse! I screamed bloody murder and leapt away from the bin. Rita, my savior and go-to gal for anything I cannot handle in the yard was not home, so I went to beg my other next door neighbor to come help me. I just wanted him to take out the pitch fork and close the lid so that I could pretend I didn't encounter a mouse. He graciously did so and I spent the rest of the afternoon convincing myself that I hadn't really seen a mouse - it was really a leaf that moved as I was turning the compost and from the corner of my eye it LOOKED like a mouse. Oh, how I really want to think that it was a leaf! Then, this morning, I made the mistake of googling it to see if there was any possibility that a mouse could be in my compost bin. BIG mistake!! Story after story of people finding mice in their bins, of people who understood going into it that mice would be something they could expect. It makes me dizzy just thinking about it! I can deal with a lot of things, but not that and I really have no idea what I can do about it! I need to find someone to take care of this for me - this is truly above and beyond my capabilities and tolerances! You know what would be ideal? If I could use one of the Enterprise's transporters to beam the whole mess - mice and all - out into space!

Beets: They're What's for Dinner!

But not tonight. My fecund little garden has been growing the biggest beet ever and every day I have gone out and said a little prayer asking God to put a little plastic bubble around that beet to protect it from the groundhog/squirrel/bunny. And every day that beet grew bigger and bigger. You see, I had plans for that beet: Michele's homecoming. I wanted her to see it growing in the ground and then pick it with me and then we'd cook it up and eat it together! And I know that you all think that next I will say that the groundhog/squirrel/bunny got to it first. . .but no! We just picked it today and cooked it up! bwahahahaha!! We got one over on the groundhog/squirrel/bunny!! The thing is, it took too long to cook, so we actually had grilled cheese sandwiches with slices of tomatoes inside & homemade pickles on the side. Yum!! We'll have beets tomorrow.

Now you all may remember when I was just an abecedarian and first tried beet juice, straight, no chaser. Well, now that I am more advanced, more educated, I've decided to add a little sugar, chill it, and have it over ice. I'll let you know how it is tomorrow. Michele refuses to even try the beet greens, least more the juice. She claims she's living vicariously through me.

By the way #1: You may have noticed that I used two words of the day in this post. Well, that is to appease my sister who complained that since I did not blog yesterday, she was bereft and uneducated about the word of the day. So the first word was yesterday's. Enjoy!

By the way #2: If you are interested in a small purse-sized tote bag, I am having a sale at my shop: The Perfect Little Tote Bag Sale!! There are only two left, so if that's up your alley, grab them while the grabbing's good!

The Culprit

Well, I have always been one to admit when I am wrong. I have been wrong to condemn the bunnies and squirrels. It was not they who were eating all my tomatoes, oh no! It was a groundhog - and I always thought they were so cute! Unfortunately, ground hogs are quite large and, when they are standing up, are able to reach at least midway up my tomato plants. So, the generosity I have displayed in "letting" what I thought were bunnies and squirrels eat the fruit on the bottom of the plants with the knowledge that they wouldn't be able to reach the higher fruits is now moot! The friendly neighborhood groundhog can reach whatever fruits she wants! I will say that when I saw that groundhog plucking up my tomatoes, I had to bowdlerize my mind before being able to generate the family-friendly text of this post. Tomato-stealing groundhogs certainly bring out the worst in me!!